Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I understand how hurricane paths work

How do people move on so quickly? I’m still sprung over someone I was dating and he found someone else so fast. I feel hurt because I’m still head over heels over him while he’s out enjoying his life with someone new

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t buy bullshit

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I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I have a reading level above third grade

I actually pay taxes

Why do boobs of some girls bounce when they walk?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I can read

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Is Tinder the best dating app?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

What is the most inappropriate thing your wife has done in front of you?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Why do men think I’m easy just by looking at me?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

Why cant I ever fall asleep with my boyfriend?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

What were my 10 favorite great rock albums that were either forgotten or hardly known by the rock community at large during 1965-‘75?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

When does a woman know she is cumming?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I see through liars

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

What's the funniest thing you heard in a movie theater?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I have complete contempt for fakery

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

What is the best way to keep my vagina clean and fresh?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Why are black people seen as scary or a threat to some people?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

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I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I can count

Do people of NYC drive around Central Park all the time? Is there any subway tunnel to cross the park quickly? Is it annoying for people and does it cause traffic?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

What caused the Democratic Party's 2024 presidential campaign to implode so horrifically?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y